Avid Behaving Badly #18: Avid AVC-Intra 100 Still Exists

Has anyone, in the last ten years, ever intentionally used the Avid AVC-Intra 100 codec for fucking anything?  Seriously.  I would love for someone to speak the fuck up here and tell me why this shit ass codec still exists.  Because holy fuck is it ever a shitty codec.  It's low res, poor quality, and has a huge file size.  There is literally zero reason you'd ever use it.  DNx36 is a baller-ass pimp codec in comparison, and don't even get me started on the best codec ever made, DNx145.  WHAT THE FUCK, AVID?  CLEAN YOUR FUCKING ROOM.  Seriously, there's so much old "legacy" bullshit in this program that just has no goddam reason for existing.  Just in case anyone from Avid is reading this, let me enlighten you:

AVC-Intra 100.  Fuck you.

Motion effects that aren't "Timewarp."

Resize, reposition, etc. effects that aren't "3D Warp."

For that matter, if you can promote the effect to anything, WHY FUCKING HAVE IT?  You know what I do when I have to fix someone's shoddy graphics work?  The first goddamn thing I do?  I PROMOTE THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF IT.  Half the time that fixes any render issues right there, without any actual work needing to be done.  I'm just sayin'.

Why is "play" still a command you can use, when "play/pause toggle" exists, and - while I'm asking - why the everlasting fuckstobber is "play" a default key???  Get that weak ass shit the fuck outta here, Avid!

And why is "group" an option when "multigroup" exists and does the same thing as group does when you're selecting only one group's worth of clips??  WHY?  It's like Avid is giving me two cups, one that holds only six ounces, and one that holds an unlimited goddamn amount of liquid, and then telling me to choose which one to use every single time I need to use one.  GUESS WHICH CUP ALWAYS WORKS, AVID?  FUCKING GUESS!!  Do you need thirty-seven menu items in the fucking hamburger menus?  NO, you fucking don't.

You know what else you don't need?  Any of the fucking wipes.  Good god.  Either there's a shitload of editors I've never met who don't understand how animatte and the paint effect work, or all of these wipes are just shitty layovers from 1970's effects that have no business in an NLE to begin with.  Seriously, these effects are so easy to reproduce with the other effects you have, WHY HAVE THEM AT ALL???

And what about that useless fucking "info" tab in the main project window?  Why does that worthless stepchild of a tab exist?  You know what happens when I click it?  I get a window that has two fucking buttons in it, and no info at all!  I can click that "hardware" button to get some hardware info, but why the shit-flinging gibbon isn't that just the default display here?  You know what makes one editor good and another great?  The great editor minimizes button presses.  They probably also don't take time out of work to type angry fucking blog posts, but whatever, fuck you.  So get that redundant and unnecessary shit out of my face, Avid.  Clean your shit up and figure out why the fuck any of this crap exists.  Make it justify it's worthless-ass existence.

AVC-Intra 100...  It's cute, Avid.  Totally cute that you think people use or even want this crap.  People used to think rock music was the devil, it was okay to own other people, and a horse and buggy was the pinnacle of transportation technology, but we got past that bullshit somehow.  Time to pull your own weight, Avid.  For fuck's sake.

Comments

  1. James FC HolmesJanuary 31, 2019 at 9:14 AM

    In the UK we deliver AS11 as a standard across all channels which is an AVC Intra 100 codec.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

How to Reset your PRAM and Delete your Site Settings

After two years, it has occurred to me that I have been remiss in my duties.  Up until now I've failed to mention the most basic troubleshooting techniques for dealing with Avid:  Resetting your PRAM and Deleting your Site Settings.  Seriously, what's wrong with my brain? Basically whenever you're getting weird errors, or multiple bus thread error crashes in a row, or "you can't write to drive X" message when pretty fucking clearly you have write permissions, the problem isn't you; it's Avid.  That's a shocker, I know, and wholly unexpected, but the fact of the matter is that Avid is the only program I've ever used that required regular resetting of your Mac's PRAM (Parameter Random Access Memory).  Avid is also one of the rare pieces of software that corrupts it's own fucking settings.  Seriously, how is that even possible, Avid?  you generate  the settings on launch, so can't you do a goddamn checksum to make sure the existing o
Read more

Exception: SYS_ERROR, OSErr: -5000

Image
Dear ISIS:  I love you.  You're great.  None of the bullshit file count limits of Unity, I can fill your drives to 100% without issue, you have automatic redundancy built into your RAID storage, your control panel is .html based and runs in my browser, and you work over ethernet instead of requiring fiberoptic cable.  You're pretty fucking swell. But there's this one thing you do sometimes that reminds me you're made by Avid.  See, it's like this:  When I create a user that has write access to a drive, and I log in as that user, I goddamn expect to be able to write to that fucking drive. Instead, Avid gives me this: What the fuck is that supposed to mean, Avid?  You're blaming the goddamn system OS for the fact that ISIS mounted my drive with incorrect permissions?  Why the christ would you do that?  Wait, wait - hang on while I get out my goddamn dictionary of What the Fuck OSErr: -5000 means. Okay, yeah, this is a write error.  It means I can't wr
Read more

File 'Avid_MediaFiles' not found.

Image
This is a great error.  It's great for a couple of reasons.  Firstly, the problem isn't that "Avid_MediaFiles' can't be found.  That's the folder on your media drive named "Avid Media Files" and it's pretty goddamn easily found by both you and Avid.  No, the real problem is that a file *inside* Avid Media Files can't be found.  Which file?  Good question.  A database file.  What this error message should really say is: File 'msmFMID.pmr' not found. OR File 'msmMMOB.mdb' not found. Or the error message could be actually helpful and say: The File 'msmFMID.pmr' which should be in path 'MediaDriveA/Avid Media Files/MXF/Ingest1' cannot be found. You know, something actually fucking helpful.  But no.  No, this message basically just says that Avid lost something, it isn't sure what, and it sure as shit isn't going to let you save any bins until you fix the problem.  Also, opening the Med
Read more